So I’m going to talk to about the Christmas coming up, how I feel about Christmas and how I cope with the festivities alongside my mental health.

As a child I think I had good Christmas times. I don’t remember having a bad one but when I started to grow up and my sister didn’t believe in Father Christmas anymore I lost interest in Christmas as the fun of it had gone. Getting older I started to notice that I didn’t feel comfortable in groups even within my family but I didn’t want to speak about it. I felt stupid, awkward and didn’t want to ruin Christmas for everyone else. This continued throughout my life.

I wonder do I look back in anger or disgust at myself that I didn’t open up to my family so I could feel more at ease? Do I feel like I have missed out on Christmas with family? I don’t think I have but I wished I could of felt more at ease in those family get-togethers.

Now it’s 2018. I still struggle with my mental health but I have a better grip on it now. I can actually say I am looking forward to Christmas this year. Me and my partner have done all the Christmas shopping and it’s wrapped. I found it hard with my partner to stop buying things as there is just loads out there we could get for everyone. I’m looking forward to seeing family, having dinner and just looking at how far everyone has come this year.

If you’re struggling with anything over Christmas please don’t forget there is the Samaritans you can call on 116 123 they are always open and will firstly listen to you and talk if you want.

I hope you enjoy this blog and I just want to take this time to wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.